The Last Temptation of Christ and Me

I've been alive forever and I wrote the very first song
Did a duet with Jesus till them Romans came along
Before they could crucify him, he taught me a thing or two
He took me to a Texas Monster truck rally
and he taught me the art of Kung Fu
Well the lord on the cross, he called to me
and he beckoned me to draw near
He said from his vantage point upon the cross
"I can see your house from up here"
So I downed a 12 pack and I tried to kick back
Then he told me it was time to go
We made our escape to the year 2000
In a hot wired UFO
Well we landed down soth surfing on my buddy's couch
Watching episodes of Raw is War
Been drinking all day he took my Perrier
And turned it into Kendall Jackson Merlot
He filled up my cup and turned the bottle up
He said,"Today's religions lost it's sight."
Stop taking what they offer be your own flying saucer
Buddy don't believe the hype
Last temptation
A mass inebriation
Sugar cubes and LSD
Ain't takin nothing from him
It's just the second coming
And the last temptation
of Christ and me