A Funny Thing Happened To Me On The Way To
Dealy Plaza/The Last Temptation of Christ and Me
I've been alive forever and I wrote the very first song

Did a duet with Jesus till them Romans came along

Before they could crucify him, he taught me a thing or two

He took me to a Texas Monster truck rally

and he taught me the art of Kung Fu

Well the lord on the cross, he called to me

and he beckoned me to draw near

He said from his vantage point upon the cross

"I can see your house from up here"

So I downed a 12 pack and I tried to kick back

Then he told me it was time to go

We made our escape to the year 2000

In a hot wired UFO

Well we landed down soth surfing on my buddy's couch

Watching episodes of Raw is War

Been drinking all day he took my Perrier

And turned it into Kendall Jackson Merlot

He filled up my cup and turned the bottle up

He said,"Today's religions lost it's sight."

Stop taking what they offer be your own flying saucer

Buddy don't believe the hype

Last temptation

A mass inebriation

Sugar cubes and LSD

Ain't takin nothing from him

It's just the second coming

And the last temptation

of Christ and me

El Jeffe De La Medellin
Killed my way to the top

Now I give the orders

Trafficking cocaine

Across the U.S. borders

Greed’s my only ally

Consume and devour

First you get the money

Then you get the power

El Jeffe de la Medillin

Mas dinero para mi

Livin La Vida Loca

Con pistolas y machetes

Fuck the DEA

American drug czar

Try to fuck with me

We go to fucking war

Fucking CIA

Send in their covert spies

Sent to home in body bags

With Colombian neckties

Call me El Jeffe

Yeah I’m the boss

Of the coke trade

I’ve paid the cost

Protect my interests

Through blood loss

Call me El Jeffe

Not Enough Ways To Say I Hate You

Hey motherfucker

Yeah you, you motherfucker

You fucking motherfucker

I hate you motherfucker

Fuck you motherfucker

You goddamn motherfucker

I’ll kill you motherfucker

Wanna blow your fucking brains out

There’s not enough ways

There’s not enough ways

There’s not enough ways

To say I hate you


I don't wanna be a fuckin junkie forever

I don't wanna be a junkie at all

Can't eat, can't sleep, can't cope

Can't kill my need for dope

Can't work, can't live, can't kick

can't stop, I'll wind up dope sick

No life, no faith, no hope

No love except for dope

just live for one more fix

or else I wind up dope sick

Lyrics pg.1

Lyrics pg.3

All songs written by Scott Waldrop